Challenges of an Autistic Brother

There are challenges to having a brother with autism, and Crash has reached the age where he is beginning to see and feel those challenges.  Crash is aware that certain behaviors draw attention and "embarrass" those around you.  He is becoming aware that not everyone embraces the quirkiness of your autistic brother and sometimes they want to exclude him.  But he's 7 and he WANTS to be included, he NEEDS to be included, so there have been times this summer where he has chosen friends over family.  

As a parent, it's a hard lesson to teach.  You completely understand the feelings of your 7 year old, but you also feel the pain when your 10 year old is left crying because he was excluded. Trying to tell your 7 year old that brother's stick together and defend one another has an extra dimension when your brother is different.  

Until now, we have be extremely fortunate that everyone has ALWAYS included Dash and embraced his quirkiness.  I love my friends for that.  They see only the very best in Dash, even when I cannot.  But now we have encountered someone who has not been taught that everyone is different, and you include those people that don't fit your definition of "normal".  It's been a challenge for sure, but we have all learned a lot.  The reality is that not everyone will be as loving as our friends, not everyone will accept Dash for who he is, and we must be prepared for those moments.  Those heartbreaking moments when he is singled out as the odd one and he won't understand.  I know every child feels those moments at one time or another, it's part of life.  It just hurts a little more when your autistic child is excluded for something that is completely beyond his control and he can't make sense of it all.  

We learn by living this crazy thing called life ... each day brings something new, and each day I'm grateful for my two loving, silly, adorable, sometimes difficult boys!